You know, it’s strange to me that when I say that all heterosex is rape, women assume I’m talking about *women’s* desires. They think that what I’m saying is that no woman is capable of deciding she’d like to have sex with a man. This is a mistaken interpretation.
What I am saying is, simply, that all men are rapists.
I spoke before about how my grandmother lived with my thief of a cousin a while back. Because he was a thief, through and through, whenever he had his eye on something, my grandmother would either hide it at her daughter’s house or she’d “give” it to him. So that he wouldn’t steal it.
Now, it was always my opinion that regardless of the fact that my grandmother considered herself to have “given” him these items (when she wasn’t ferreting them away at my aunt’s house) my cousin stole those items. You can’t really “give” anything to a thief who intended to take it anyway.
So, in saying that my cousin stole from my grandmother, I’m not saying anything *at all* about her own propensity to give him stuff. I am not saying that my grandmother wasn’t a giving person, or that she never *desired* to give him anything. She probably did. It’s just that none of that outweighs the fact that he would have taken it anyway.
I feel similarly about heterosex. Even if a woman wants it – and I’m sure plenty of women do – it doesn’t outweigh the fact that men would rape her anyway. The men are *rapists*. It’s what they do. “Wanting it” doesn’t change that, though I’m not denying that some women do in fact “want it.”
I also see this dynamic in the honor-suicides-by-burning and -hanging that occur in some places in the world, where one or more male relatives make a woman “choose” to kill herself. When you agree to kill yourself in the face of a man or a mob of men who would kill you anyway, your “choice” to kill yourself is moot. Those men are murderers.
I really do feel sometimes as if people *willfully* miss my points. I’m not sure I understand why that is, but I have decided that it’s intentional.
written by Margaret on
04. Juni 2009
June 6th, Paddy said:
ok....wasn't expecting THAT ! have i maybe misinterpreted it or does 'Margaret' actually mean: "Even if a woman wants it – and I’m sure plenty of women do – it doesn’t outweigh the fact that men would rape her anyway. The men are *rapists*. It’s what they do"
Personally i think this is one of the most insulting, narrow-minded gereralizations i have ever read. i cant believe this lady actually wrote this. I pray she hasn't had a bad experience - but i also pray that she keeps her opinions to herself in future.