We don’t always express love. You may always feel it, but expressing it requires acts – both subtle and overt – that transmit your feelings and lead the other person to be happy. Open up and be more demonstrative if you want the one you desire to stick around.
Love is Intending Happiness ~
We want to make those we love happy, feel cared for, and fulfilled. We take actions to ensure those conditions in them. Sometimes this means putting your own agenda second. You do so because you feel ecstatic about seeing your loved one shine or excel. If you’re getting a lot from a relationship, you simply must give something back – and what you need to give isn’t always what you want to let go of.
Love is Accepting ~
This means you accept the person for who they are. You don’t just think they’re “okay,” you enjoy who they are – quirks and all. In an ideal situation, you have few conditions on your love. If your love is conditional, it ceases as soon as the person steps outside of a narrowly defined set of circumstances. People with lots of complaints in a relationship aren’t truly loving. If you have lots of complaints in your relationship, you’re dooming it.
Love is Appreciating ~
One step beyond acceptance is appreciation. This means you enjoy the person and all the physical and character traits that make them unique. You focus on their joy, their insights, their humor, and their companionship. Don’t you realize this person is a gift that’s been placed in your life? Treat this gift shabbily, and it will be taken away in true cause and effect fashion. The universe will give you just what you’re really asking for.
One of the most common methods of expressing love is to give someone your attention, whether to listen to them, spend time with them, or do something kind or important for them. We touch them through affectionate or sexual means, as well. We can share thoughts and feelings, trade ideas, or even help with a chore.
Aside from all the evidence of love in art and philosophy, psychology has divided love into three components: Intimacy, Commitment, and Passion. Ancient wisdom has even called love a high form of Tolerance – a view that seems to fit all the scholarly criteria.
Certain types of love can involve compatibility, but certainly not all. Many children are not compatible with their parents, but are loved nonetheless. Romantic love is uncertain when discussing compatibility. You have to think in terms of the relationship and the feelings as a whole – and how you can make each other happy. You can’t focus on the most immediate gratification for either party. Love is a constant process, though. Be with the one you love, share your joy, and encourage his or hers.
Always be there for each other ~
To love is to step totally outside your comfort zone sometimes, just to give the gift of joy to the one you wish to keep close. Fail to be flexible or forget to bite your tongue more times than you currently do, and you will lose the world’s most blessed gift: the love of a special someone.
CONFESSION #04 - WHY WE LOVE & NEED LOVE
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Editorial 09. Sept. 2009